Richard’s Ramblings

“Help! I’m Being Stalked by a Playboy Bunny!”

I’d love to see that headline on newsstands, emblazoned across the top of the latest issue of the National Enquirer. It is only my restraint in protecting my loyal reader who has been threatened with bodily harm from Stephanie Adams, Miss November 1992, that I have not done so already. Although, if and when he ever grants me permission, I will jump at the opportunity.

Stephanie is continuing to send emails without provocation on my reader’s part. The latest:

Thought you should know…

My Uncle’s best guy (who works for him) moved to Mountain View, California today. You see, he got this great job at [your company] and will be giving a “hands on approach” to the employees there. Isn’t that wonderful?

Have a nice day… and do be careful. I hear that the area you live in is not too safe.

California Penal Code Section 422 states, “Any person who willfully threatens to commit a crime which will result in death or great bodily injury to another person, with the specific intent that the statement, made verbally, in writing, or by means of an electronic communication device, is to be taken as a threat, even if there is no intent of actually carrying it out, which, on its face and under the circumstances in which it is made, is so unequivocal, unconditional, immediate, and specific as to convey to the person threatened, a gravity of purpose and an immediate prospect of execution of the threat, and thereby causes that person reasonably to be in sustained fear for his or her own safety or for his or her immediate family’s safety, shall be punished by imprisonment in the county jail not to exceed one year, or by imprisonment in the state prison.”

Stephanie, be very careful and reconsider before you send any more nasty emails, unless your fantasy is to actually live some of those girl-girl jailhouse porns in which so many of you Playmates appear.

I think I hear Big Betty calling out your name in her lustful dreams…

If you liked this, you might also be interested in:

• Stephanie Threatens my ISP…
• Stephanie Adams is Wacko…
• A Letter to Playboy Enterprises…
• You’re Advertizement Hear [sic]…
• Wikipedia Editing Weirdness…
• What is a Friend?
• Web Designing in the Nude…