Oh, Those Silly Ebayers…
I can’t believe I missed out on the “HAIR GEL as owned by Darth Vader relative” auction. For a single British penny, I could have owned “one almost empty pot of Hair Gel as owned by the son of a friend of David Prowse (aka Darth Vader). Strictly limited edition.”
Apparently someone in Manistique, Michigan, is tired of his antique used postcard collection and is selling them off one by one. The old black-and-white photo of the Mount Pleasant “Pubic Library” in Iowa should raise a few eyebrows. Spell checkers can’t catch everything!
And who can pass up the postcard of the goat nursing the baby?! If there’s a generally accepted spelling of “Ewwwww!”, I sure can’t find it!
In May of 2000, a small bottle fashioned in the shape of a trøll sold for $6.50. The seller penned its description as “I don’t know what material is used, but it is very hard.” How fortunate! The world does not need a soft trøll-shaped bottle, methinks…
How about that September 1999 auction of a Dean Martin hand puppet? The last thing I want to do it stick my hand inside Dean Martin. Worse yet, it looks exactly like Joey from Friends. I don’t want to stick my hand there either!
“I just had the product idea that will rocket our humble salt and pepper shaker manufacturing facility to number one! We’ll have a reclining nude lady with removable HH-cup breasts through which we’ll dispense the seasonings. Great idea, huh?!” Despite the fact the auction was almost three years ago, I hope the guy that dreamed up this one is still looking for a job…
I am in tears at my desk, barely able to control myself for fear of letting my laughter loose and making a hysterical scene, recalling the August 2000 auction of the toy monkey that was clad in black and white pinstripes and a bright red three-button vest. He held a red plastic cup in his left hand. Dangling from the cup was a sign that read “Push dice cup back and I shoot çráp.” Admittedly, I initially missed the word “dice” and pleaded, “Please, PLEASE tell me that’s just a typo on the tag…”
