Richard’s Ramblings

• Remember, an amateur built the Ark; professionals built the Titanic.
• Latest survey shows that 3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the world’s population.
• Man who sneezes without tissue takes matters into his own hands.
• The truth is out there? Anyone know the URL?
• Panties are not the best thing on earth, but are next to it.
• A conscience does not prevent sin. It only prevents you from enjoying it.
• Junk is something you keep for years and then throw out two weeks before you need it.
• Where there’s a will, I want to be in it.
• I love my country but fear my government.
• On the other hand, you have different fingers.
• Virginity is like a bubble. One prìçk, and it’s gone.
• War doesn’t determine who’s right. War determines who’s left.
• I wish there was a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence. There’s a knob called brightness, but it doesn’t work.
• If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving is not for you.
• Doesn’t expecting the unexpected make the unexpected become the expected?
• My karma ran over my dogma.
• Just remember… if the world didn’t suck, we’d all fall off.
• It was recently discovered that research causes cancer in rats.
• I’m a nobody, nobody is perfect, therefore I’m perfect.
• Nothing is fool-proof to a sufficiently talented fool.
• You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.
• A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.
• Learn as if you will live forever; live as if you will die tomorrow.

If you liked this, you might also be interested in:

• Hmmmm. Sorry, I can't seem to find anything similar to this that you might enjoy.