Richard’s Ramblings

Since I’ve been a bit too anti-French lately…

• Only in America is lemonade made with artificial flavors and dishwashing liquid is made with real lemons.
• Only in America can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
• Only in America are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.
• Only in America do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
• Only in America do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a DIET coke.
• Only in America do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.
• Only in America do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
• Only in America do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won’t miss a call from someone we didn’t want to talk to in the first place.
• Only in America do hot dogs come in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.
• Only in America do drive-up ATM machines have instructions in Braille lettering.

Most of these are so NOT new…

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