Lizard Lick Towing Has Been Licked

When TruTV first introduced Lizard Lick Towing in its pseudo-reality-show All Worked Up, the Lizard Lick segments were the most entertaining, least idiotic (at the time), and had the most likable characters.

Once the popularity of the repossession service reached critical mass, a spin-off show titled as the repo company’s name was created by TruTV, starring the same charismatic and oddly lovable characters, mainly Ron Shirley and his wife Amy. However, each season the show gets worse — the repos getting sillier, the vehicle’s owners getting dumber and more violent, and the situations drummed up by the show’s writers getting more inane each week.

Caught up in the “reality” of the show and refuse to believe the show is scripted? You are not alone. Like the unexplainable phenomena that is wrestling, most ardent viewers appear to believe the self-proclaimed reality show is just that — reality. Yet the only thing real about the show is that Ron and Amy Shirley do own the repo company (with a Wendell, NC address) which Ron built up over 20 years. Bobby, Ron’s long-time friend on the show, has only been onboard for three years; his joining the company a result of needing to pay off his own vehicle repossessed by Lizard Lick.

“man I was so sd to see the last show and was like no Ron would not do that to us and Im glad I was right thanks Ron for keeping it real” — a blog comment written by fan “Glen Dix”, his misspellings and lack of punctuation left intact.

The town of Lizard Lick, North Carolina isn’t even a real town. It’s an unincorporated community about 20 miles from the state capital. According to the Chicago Tribune, “Lizard Lick almost died the way a lot of small towns die. Its connection to the outside world, U.S. Hwy. 64, was replaced by a more modern bypass, cutting the crossroad-community’s steady traffic flow to an irregular trickle.”

While not a state-recognized municipality, the area has had a self-proclaimed mayor since 1975. Charles Wood won the “election” in a landslide victory, garnering 1,500 of the town’s resident’s 40 votes, a result of the creative democratic process that allowed anyone who lived in or simply passed through the town to vote for their favorite candidate. Ron’s mayoral bid and subsequent loss to Sam Davis in the show is in a similar vein of hooey.

We still watch the show when there’s nothing left on the DVR, but Lizard Lick is less a program about three Southern comrades running a questionably reputable repo business and increasingly more like three C-list actors putting on a show about a redneck repo business gone wild — with the occasional Hallelujah thrown in for good measure, blanketed by myriad backwater expressions you’ve never before heard:

  • “It’s hotter than two hamsters farting in a wool sock.”
  • “He’s as slick as a three-legged dog trying to cover crap on an ice-covered pond.”
  • “She could suck the feathers off a duck with that mouth.”
  • “You’re as useless as an ashtray on a motorcycle.”
  • “I’d rather be chewing the bûtthølë off a skunk.”
  • “He’s slower than Stephen Hawking in a blizzard.”

Screen Credits

Further proof of the scripted nature of the show, several of the secondary characters are now unmasked:

  • Mayor Sam Davis is played by Jeff Kidd who omits the show from his primary SAG resume but adds it to his non-union resume.
  • The jeweler who accused Bobby of stealing was played by Christy Pierce; she appears to have only one resume.
  • While unimportant to the plot, Leah Alexandra Caruana lists her role as a bystander on Lizard Lick on her resume. As does Ethan Williford for his role as an extra.
  • Other non-union extras include Nick Burroughs, Camile Lesage, Chelsea Reeves, and Joseph Cox — all listed on 800casting.com (login or good Google skills required).
  • Actor/entertainer Patrick Moize lists Lizard Lick Towing on his Linked-In profile.