A Typical WoW Conversation

[Party] [Mage] We’ve been looking for a 5th for UD strat for 2 hrs.
[Party] [Paladin] Looks like it’s not gonna happen…
[4. Looking For Group] [Hunter] 60 Hunter LFG UD Strat!
[Party] [Warrior] What about that rogue? What was his name – Xingxiao?
[Party] [Mage] He’s a farmer who /needs everything. Plus he doesn’t know how to sap
[Party] [Paladin] I can live without sap
[Party] [Priest] Nah he’s doing UBRS
[4. Looking For Group] [Hunter] 60 Hunter LFG UD Strat!!
[Party] [Warrior] Dammit! I can’t believe nobody wants to do strat
[Party] [Priest] What about a 54 lock? Too low?
[Party] [Paladin] Seriously guys, if we don’t find somebody soon I’m gonna go BG
[4. Looking For Group] [Hunter] 60 Hunter LFG UD Strat!!!!!
[Party] [Warrior] Gah! I was trying to invite the warlock and I accidentally invited that hunter
[Party] [Mage] WTF????
[Party] [Warrior] Was a MT… gøddåmn hunter’s been spamming me all night.
[Party] [Priest] OMFG – nice job, genius!!
Hunter has joined your party.
[Party] [Hunter] Sweet! Let’s do strat!
[Party] [Priest] Welcome!

If you’ve ever played World of Warcraft, you’ll understand.

A Day Without Illegal Immigrants (NSFW)

Yesterday, close to a million illegal immigrants and their supporters took to the streets in New York, Washington, Las Vegas, Miami, Chicago, San Jose, Atlanta, Denver, and countless other cities to rally together to protest proposed immigration laws — Congress passed immigration reform in December that makes illegal immigration a felony and calls for building 700 miles of security fence along the US-Mexico border.

About 7.2 million illegal immigrants hold jobs in the United States, making up 4.9 percent of the overall labor force, according to a recent study by the Pew Hispanic Center in Washington, D.C. To accommodate this large potential constituent base, in response to the protests, the Senate is considering a proposal that would allow illegal immigrants to obtain legal status (and eventually citizenship) by working for six years, paying a fine, undergoing a background check, and learning English.

I am not on the fence on this issue, nor do I wish to provide an unbiased report in this case: send them all home (forcibly, if necessary), build a wall, and stop them from streaming over the borders. Use the vastly overpopulated prison system to replace the lost labor (instead of letting inmates watch cable TV and pump iron at my expense).

The only impact felt personally yesterday was that the neighborhood car wash was closed in support of the rally, thereby permanently losing my custom. The car wash is an impediment to traffic and safety on the busy street corner anyway, and it is environmentally unfriendly thanks to the copious amounts of chemicals that are leaked all over the streets and sidewalks.

Photo © iStockPhoto.com / A. K. Nicholas

When you have an illiterate, undocumented work force, all sorts of abuses by employers can take place. When you allow people to violate the law — either illegal alien workers, or the employers of such aliens — they will take advantage of it, or be taken advantage of. If we must suffer through having the car wash here in the first place, send in the INS, deport the illegal immigrants, and let legal high school and college students take over scrubbing cars.

The illegal immigrant cheerleaders at a topless car wash in Los Angeles, California, have frequently complained of incidents of harrassment and bullying of employees, workers being paid only in tips, hazardous working conditions, and a lack of break time.

That’s what happens when you’re an illegal immigrant worker illegally employed by someone who thrives on exploiting illegal workers.

Not that all such workers be topless or nude, but private, indoor, law-abiding topless car washes can provide lucrative income for young women without a college degree. There’s a big difference between a monthly welfare check and the $700 to $1,500 women can earn at a topless car wash in a week. A field reporter for Columbus Alive, Melissa Starker (not pictured), said that while it wasn’t an experience she’d choose to relive, there “was something safe about the physical barrier of glass and metal between washer and client.”

Author’s note: Anyone else find it amusing that the reporter’s last name is a British slang term for being “stark naked“? I wouldn’t make this stuff up even if I could.

Others I know personally share the same sentiment; I spoke with an immigrant last week about yesterday’s pending demonstration. Yuri immigrated legally from the Ukraine; after ten years of red tape and bureaucracy, he was finally granted US citizenship. Having millions of immigrants who are breaking the law by just being here and who have the gall to protest for free amnesty, angers him — he feels it cheapens the sacrifice he gave to have these whiners jump in line in front of everyone else who is choosing to follow the legal route.

Another immigrant, this one from New Zealand, expressed the same opinions as the Ukranian mentioned above. Also, Peter felt that cracking down on employers who are hiring illegal workers is a major part of the solution to the problem. Eliminate or at least significantly reduce the number of companies willing to pay illegal workers and the issue self-resolves.

A coalition of Hispanic-American groups held a news conference to stress that the protesters did not represent all Hispanics. Retired Col. Albert F. Rodriguez, a war veteran, said he understands the contribution immigrants have made to the United States, “but the difference is that we and millions of others like us did it legally. We’re all here today to tell all those illegal protesters, ‘You do not speak for me.'”

These rallies were perfect opportunities missed by the government to round up millions of illegal immigrants and kick them out on their åssës. Nobody with a functioning brain could possibly argue that someone who breaks the law to enter the country illegally should have any legal rights here whatsoever. And nobody with any notion of social justice and integrity would support a populace that, through their organized walk-out, sends the loud and clear message, “I’m here in the United States illegally, choosing to break the law. I’m here in the United States to work and not pay taxes. I’m here in the United States to get a free education at your expense. I’m here in the United States and I expect you to pay for my medical expenses. And I’m showing my support for my fellow lawbreakers by choosing to skip work, to skip school, and encouraging others to do the same!”

In the end, my stance is simple:

  • If you are a legal immigrant, welcome! Stay, contribute, assimilate.
  • If you are in immigrant here illegally, you are not welcome! Go home!
  • If you want to come back, do it through legal means — and I will welcome you back into the United States with open arms…

[This message was also sent electronically in part to Congresswoman Zoe Lofgren, Senator Barbara Boxer, and Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger.]