You Know You’re Too Much Into Harry Potter When…

  • You wave your pen around and repeat “wingardium leviOHsa” to various inanimate objects
  • You talk in low hisses to snakes
  • You want to buy a train and name it the Hogwarts Express
  • You glue a compass to the dashboard of your car and try to get the car to fly
  • You try to make polyjuice potion
  • You get a diary and never write in it
  • You believe that you know more about Harry Potter than J. K. Rowling does
  • You see a murderer holding a knife in a movie and you shout out “Expelliarmus!”
  • You try to make your chess pieces move and talk
  • You draw a lightning scar on your forehead
  • You start sleeping in the closet under the stairs
  • You are absolutely certain that your letter from Hogwarts is lost in the mail and that it will arrive any day now
  • You travel into forests looking for injured unicorns
  • You wish ESPN would show Quidditch
  • You wish your dog would grow 2 more heads
  • You had to go to the hospital after breaking your nose running headfirst into the wall between platforms nine and ten
  • You name your first child Harry or Hermione
  • On Halloween you give little trick or treaters dressed up as Harry Potter characters more candy than the other ones
  • You look at the local community college’s curriculum for courses on Transfiguration and Defense Against the Dark Arts
  • You buy a rat, name him Peter, and put a sign on the cage that reads “Azkaban”
  • You own a white owl
  • You always write out Harry Potter instead of just HP
  • HP doesn’t mean just Hewlett-Packard anymore
  • You check daily to see if Moaning Myrtle has moved into your toilet
  • You commission signmakers in England to create a Platform 9 3/4 sign for your wall (*ahem*)
  • You add Hogwarts and Quidditch to your spell checker
  • You create a list like this…

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Responses

6 Responses to “You Know You’re Too Much Into Harry Potter When…”

  1. Response #1
    dPrisoner (IP) on June 22nd, 2004 at 10:56 pm

    Or you could spend the money to import the UK editions of the first book and the first DVD because it’s the “Philosopher’s Stone” and not the “Sorcerer’s Stone.” But I did like the “HP doesn’t mean just Hewlett-Packard anymore” line. That one could have caused a spit-take or drink up the nose - if I had been drinking at the time…

  2. Response #2
    richard on June 23rd, 2004 at 9:34 pm

    Sure, but do you have the Latin version?!

  3. Response #3
    the14milo (IP) on June 24th, 2004 at 11:14 am

    Ohh man that is awesome!! I am laughing SO hard right now! I loved the LOTR thing, too, but Harry Potter is just that much better! Also, you could add that they erected a shrine in their house dedicated to the books and movies *cough* me *cough*

  4. Response #4
    Richard Broman (IP) on November 25th, 2005 at 6:01 am

    Just adding one to the list: You actually bother reading a long list like this one, and keep nodding your head in recognition.

  5. Response #5
    richard on July 20th, 2007 at 8:25 am

    I actually caught myself saying “Lumos!” the other day when turning on my living room lights with my handheld remote control…

  6. Response #6
    stacey (IP) on July 22nd, 2007 at 4:41 pm

    Or you are watching “Transformers” and when the plot-important glasses are broken, you whisper to your friend “Oculus Reparo!”…then crack up when you realize they have just leaned over to say the same to you. :^)

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