Richard’s Ramblings

• You are in the forest and see a bear and you try to make him your pet.
• You yell “LFG” when being picked for sports teams.
• You inspect people’s clothing to see if they are enchanted.
• You don’t know someone’s name and you look above their head.
• You go to a funeral and you try to loot the corpse.
• You pass a cop and wonder if you just aggroed him.
• You ask a store clerk how much you can sell your shoes for.
• You buy a bag from the store and you check to see how many slots it has.
• You visit airports just to get more flight paths.
• You ask to be Master Looter when shopping at the mall.
• You wonder if real wolves have belts and shoes on them.
• You pick up a rock and try to use it as a hearthstone.
• Talking cows and zombies don’t scare you.
• You brag to your friends that your belt gives you +5 stamina.
• You think life ends at age 70.
• You ask the nearest police officer where the closet weapon vendor is.
• You try to book a trip to Azeroth.
• You walk into a bar and ask for Stratholm Holy Water.
• You get mad when you’re not allowed to deposit your weapons in the bank.
• You run around the streets wearing nothing but underwear, shouting “GOLD PLS!”
• You buy a horse on your 40th birthday.
• You buy an even better horse on your 60th birthday.
• You buy a small plane on your 70th birthday.
• You climb on top of your mailbox and dance.
• You are still reading this.
• You go to a car dealer and ask whether the cars will increase your speed by 60% or by 100%.
• You ask whether mithril spurs are an option.
• You try to find a Mini Diablo at the local pet store.
• You walk to the next nearest city so you can fly there next time.
• You stop wondering why your backpack can hold 16 pairs of boots, but can’t hold 17 rings.
• You go to a park and pick flowers to improve your Herbalism skill.
• You start mining stones.
• You melt pennies and try to turn them into copper bars.
• Someone asks you where something is and you yell at them to look it up on thottbot.
• You ignore a level 60 demon, but remember when you ran screaming from a level 5 bear.
• You ride the bus to work, telling everyone that you’re saving up for your epic mount.
• On blah wintery days, you wish you could type “.wchange 0 0″ to make the sun come out.
• You rip your pants and try to have them fixed at a blacksmith shop.
• You install your own MaNGOS server just so you can play on Tuesday mornings.
• You look for the NumLock button when driving in your car.
• No matter what you’re doing on your computer, you first put three fingers on the A, W, and D keys.
• You drink ten cans of RedBull to increase your run speed by 30%.
• You ask everyone you meet, “Wanna join my guild?”
• Someone asks you to pick up something for them and you say “Inventory is Full.”
• You take the subway and wish it had an underground aquarium.
• You start expecting rewards for doing work.
• A beautiful girl asks you out on a date. You refuse because your guild is doing a Naxx raid.
• You didn’t think the World of Warcraft South Park episode was all that funny.
• You check your in-game mail to see how your auctions are doing before you check your email.
• When you see “Wow” in advertisements, you wonder why they got the capitalization wrong.
• Having read this, you now want to play.

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